The joy of being anonymous — unseen, unknown – may seem daunting for some, but for others it is freedom; the secret joy known by solo travellers. Sometimes, the best way to find yourself is to get lost somewhere new.
Today, I want to share a personal story about the first time I truly felt free — and how being anonymous changed my life forever.
I still remember it so vividly — my first solo trip, my first time in an Asian city, and my first time truly alone after my divorce.
I had a ticket for one to Bangkok, Thailand. I arrived in the dead of night, and the next morning, I stepped out of my hotel into the chaos of the city — and that’s when it hit me.
So this is culture shock.
The sounds — horns, motorbikes, the fast, high-pitched rhythm of Thai voices all around me.
The movement — fast, crowded, chaotic, almost suffocating.
The smells – sweet, gut retching, putrid, foods, incense, fumes.
The sights — a spinning kaleidoscope of colour, people, and motion.
For a moment, panic flickered inside me. My body went into survival mode — fight or flight. But instead of running, I stayed. I breathed. I decided to fight — to go with it, push through.
After a few minutes, my heart rate steadied, I remembered to breath and I was excited to finally be there.
I found a quiet spot, away from the crowds, where I could just stand still, not being pushed along in the busyness, and look around. And that’s when it happened — an epiphany, a lightbulb moment that changed my life forever.
A wave of peace and freedom came over me. I realised… I was completely anonymous.
No one knew me here. No one expected anything from me. No one was watching.
And for the first time in my life, that felt amazing.
Back home, I’d always felt pressure to fit in — to blend, to follow the trends, to be what others thought I should be. I never really did fit in, though. I was different. I’d been bullied for that, and for years, I wore a mask to hide it.
But here, in the middle of Bangkok, I didn’t have to fit in. In fact, I couldn’t. I was tall, pale, obviously foreign — and that was completely fine. I didn’t have to try. I didn’t have to pretend. I could just be me.
Even the language was freeing. Not hearing any English meant my brain could finally rest. I didn’t have to process conversations around me or filter what people said, I couldn’t. There was just quiet — inside.
It’s a relief, you know, when you realise you’re not going to run into anyone you know, that no one is watching you or judging what you’re doing. I was unseen, unobserved, unknown— and it was beautiful.
For the first time, I could take my mask off. I could just be me. Now I can do that in my home country … but 20 years ago I was still wearing the mask everywhere.
I didn’t have to try to be that person i think everyone around me wants me to be. I didn’t have to try to impress anyone.
Social pressure was off. Not just social pressure, it was Australian cultural pressure too, I’m not like most typical Aussies, i don’t even fit that mold back home. I’m different.
I found my own thoughts were louder when surrounded by a foreign language.
My emotions were stronger with such a mix of survival and freedom, excitement and relief. and decision making was being done alone for the first time, i could truly decide what I wanted for me and me alone.
I could decide what I wanted, make my own choices, and rely entirely on myself. And every small decision I made — navigating streets, finding food, surviving in a new city — built my confidence
My self-trust grew stronger because I had no one else to rely on but me.
And through that, I got to know myself — really know myself. What I liked. What I wanted. What made me happy.
I was anonymous, and free to be me.
That experience changed how I lived forever.
Almost 20 years later, I still find absolute joy in being anonymous when I travel. It’s freeing, elating, and grounding all at once. It’s when I feel most like myself.
I can truly “dance like no one watching” – when I dance in a crowd of backpackers at a nightclub.
As an introvert type of person, I recharge my energy from within, by being alone, in a quiet place, and solo travel gives me a special kind of energy. Even in a busy city, surrounded by people, I can recharge — because I don’t have to interact, perform, or conform.
For me, anonymity equals freedom.
It’s freedom to be myself, to listen to my thoughts, to trust my instincts, and to live life on my own terms, not being accountable to anyone but myself (and humanity as a whole).
Challenge for you this week
This week, I challenge you to travel alone, just to a nearby neighbourhood, town or a city where no one knows you.
Wear whatever makes you happy — not what’s trendy or expected.
Find a spot in the heart of the city, with hustle and bustle all around you, and just sit for a while. Breathe. Watch. Listen.
Connect with yourself.
Feel what it’s like to be anonymous.
To be unseen.
To simply be you, alone with yourself.
See what happens when you give yourself that freedom. You will get to know yourself better.
You’ve got this!
Thanks for reading, You’ve got this. ✨
And remember — sometimes, the best way to find yourself is to get lost somewhere new.
Share this with someone who might need that little nudge to step out on their own.
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Until next time—enjoy the journey, every moment of it, and go solo. stay safe.
– Linda
Linda Marie Travel 